A Squash Tale

My alternative title for this post was…‘When a random man offers you a squash…politely decline just say No!’




The reason for this alternative title will soon be clear!  As my Mom alluded in her guest post, our ride home from Door County involved squash…and quite The Squash Tale!




It all began with innocently enough with a stop by Grandma Tommy’s Country Store and the cool pumpkin patch right next door.


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I’ve never seen so many fun and creative pumpkins!


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The owners were very nice and knowledgeable about all of the different types of squashes and gourds.


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I loved how festive they were creating all of these colorful squash piles!


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As I was walking out of the store and heading out to our car, I heard an odd commotion.  I looked over to find pumpkins rolling around in the road.  Someone had driven off without shutting their back door and their purchases were soon spread across the parking lot.  All pumpkins were in tact except for one HUGE squash that was split in two! 




The owner of the patch offered up the 2 halves to a few of us paying for our pumpkins.  Since the other lady was so excited, my Mom and I figured that we too should have half of this beach ball sized gourd even though we had no idea what to do with it (or where it would fit in our already packed car).


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It took us an embarrassingly long time to leave the Door, but it was worth all of the shopping and laughs.  I kept busy through Milwaukee’s rush hour flipping through my new book.  I found this fun cookbook at a used book store during one of our last day stops. What I liked about it (besides that I love to bake) was that the creative recipes have only a few ingredients (mostly things you already have) and lots of pictures that look mouth wateringly good.




We finally made it back to my parent’s around 7pm, and I was ready for dinner.  Good thing my Mom packed up some Charlie’s smoked fish to go.


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But, we still had this squash to deal with…




Since it was late and we were clueless, we started with the basics.  Preheat oven, de-seed squash, and roast. Then sit down for an end-of-vacation glass of wine and dinner.


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But what happens 60 minutes later when you are ready to head to bed and your squash is harder than a log?  I (obviously) suggested…the crockpot!




So into the crockpot our unknown variety of squash did NOT go because it was WAY To big.  My mom attempted to cut said squash but the situation quickly turned dangerous!  I suggested the electric knife, which we had just used for the holidays.


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And when it appeared that my mom was more likely to loose a finger than cut her squash into two pieces, my Dad stepped in to assist.




It was not an easy task (taking 4 hands plus a photographer), and as my Dad pointed out…he doesn’t even like squash!




Despite a valiant effort, the squash finally gave way splitting into 2 big but not so ginormous portions.




That still didn’t fit into the crockpot…




I was laughing so hard at this point because you seriously can’t script comedy like this.  And although we were tempted to give up and toss our FREE squash to the curb…at this point, we were invested!




My Dad was able to cut the flesh away from the tough outer edge on one section of the squash and a great deal of time later, we had something for the crockpot.




Seriously…that was it!  All of that blood, sweat, and tears laughter and this was all we had to show for ourselves.  That alternative title is seeming like an obvious second choice right about now…isn’t it?!  With a little more effort, we (at this point, it was definitely a group effort) were able to salvage a little more ‘meat’ for an overnight stay in the crockpot.


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Before wrapping up the rest and heading to bed.  There is only so much laughter and shenanigans that one can take in an evening : )


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By morning, we had a unique and tasty puree. 




It had the same consistency as pumpkin but maybe a little sweeter.  Thank goodness it was so yummy or all that work would have been for nothing!  My Mom was in charge of the roasting up the rest of the squash and the next time I saw her, she had even more mystery puree.  I know that you can freeze puree and I have used it in soups in the past (so good!).  You’ll have to wait for A Squash Tale Chapter II to find out how I used this batch! 


The End!


Most important question…can you name the squash? 

I actually have no idea and because of a power outage can’t look it up. 


Number 2: Do you like squash?  What’s your favorite way to eat it?

14 thoughts on “A Squash Tale

  1. I LOVE IT! First of all, as I know your mother, I can actually picture you two trying to cook the squash – hilarious! Secondly, the best part about fall -along with the pretty colors- is the squash-I absolutely love it and can’t believe that it is 0 points plus! I put squash in rice or other pilafs, in oatmeal in the am (or as a bedtime snack), I stuff it, and even eat it straight out of the skin (right out of the oven).

    • I’m sure she will tell you that it was quite the afternoon/evening caring for our new squash : ) Yum…I never think to add it to rice, but I will definitely try that. I can never believe how good it is for you because it is so tasty and filling!

    • Me too! It was interseting to hear from the woman at the farm what she recommended and why. She knew which ones were thes sweetest and easiest to cut. I like trying new squash recipes, especially in the fall!

  2. I’m laughing with your. Giant squash have been a super challenge at our house for the last couple of years. My husband has some fancy contraption in his head that he’s yet to build me, but it includes a machete. Yes, a machete! Great idea with the electric knife; I’ve never considered that before, but we don’t have one, so I guess that’s off the table :-/

    • The machete would have been perfect! Although an electric knife sounds much safer. This was our first attempt, but I see other squash disasters in our future…ha ha! Thanks for the comment. I loved it!

  3. Ha! That’s hilarious about the squash. I’d be so committed to a freebie too. In fact, I bought 3 carver pumpkins lately to puree since I can’t get my hands on canned pumpkin puree here in the UK. That was just about as tragic. Arthritic woman with huge carving knife trying to quarter a pumpkin.. umm, scary-ness! The bit with the electric knife made me giggle even more since I was wishing I had one of those when I was attacking said pumpkins but yes, it looks lethal.

    My little-ish pumpkins took 90 mins to be soft enough to scoop the flesh out. While the other [of similar size] took just 45… strange, huh? Did you find that it didn’t yield all that much? I had to puree 2 pumpkins to get enough for just 1 can (15oz) of pumpkin puree for a recipe. The carver pumpkins were watery so I had to drain a lot of the water off by leaving the puree in a sieve over a bowl to get the right consistency but man, all that effort for such a little amount. Next time I’m making a 60 mile round trip to get the canned version!

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